Dating advice for people that work a shift / varied / unsociable / long / odd hours
Trying to fit your dating around your work can be difficult because
- first of all you need to actually be able to meet people when you're not working (because you might be working when they're free and vice versa)
- and secondly finding people that you can then continue to date because they are generally around when you are
This online dating website aims to try and help this problem and we've tried to list some of the actual problems we face whilst working odd hours. Then and once we've identified some problems people that work irregular or odd hours or shift workers may face maybe some solutions.
Problems with working irregular hours
So what might be some of the problems to working irregular hours or working a shift?:
Your tired, knackered, ready for bed from working long hours, your night shift, 12 hour shift pattern, long day, random shifts, etc.
You're not happy with how you feel because you haven't had time to eat properly and make decent dinners nor get to the gym.
Since you might have been working non-stop in the last few days everything else has not got done and gone on hold, like doing the washing up, cleaning your home, etc. and now you're not at work and on your off duty those things have to get done.
You're not looking forward to the next shift because perhaps:
- You're dreading the long night shifts
- You get tired from standing on your feet all day
- You're bored of your job
You don't get to see your friends and family as often as you would like.
You might have to work Christmas, New Year, public or bank holidays, Valentines day when a lot of other people are off enjoying themselves.
Childcare can be really difficult to arrange and you miss seeing your children.
You haven't got that routine and/or don't even know what day of the week it is!
You're always tired because you can't sleep properly as your work interferes with your sleep pattern
You find it hard to follow a tv programme so you find it hard to relax and wind down after a busy day or shift.
Dating help and advice
So what's all this got to do with dating? It can be difficult to think about dating when you're not at your best, or be in the proper frame or mind and/or be at your best on those important first dates (more advice on first dates).
If you are able to try and sort out the problems and get a better quality of life and better work life balance, you may be happier throughout everyday things and therefore more open, approachable to meet people and find someone you really like and get on well with.
Potential solutions to working irregular hours
We have identified some of the problems with working irregular hours, or long hours or working a shift pattern. Here are some potential solutions and thoughts and advice on how to rectify the problems and improve your work life balance
Managing your time
A running theme with some of the problems mentioned above is lack of time. A way to improve this would be to try and work at your organisation to improve your organisational skills. This may sound obvious to some but highlighting this and raising awareness may help in some ways. Being organised can also always be difficult to constantly put into practice and be strict with yourself to a certain degree.
As a start it can be helpful to just do bits at a time, concentrate on the basics and you might find the rest follows. Maybe try first just being organised with your food. This is because the two most important and common problems to sort out can be food and sleep:
- Make some large quantity dinners that you can freezer and then put it into the microwave for when you just want a quick meal when you get in
- Make sandwiches for your break time and when your stop for lunch and meals
- Before you go shopping make a list of the ingredients you need to try just one new healthy recipe each time when you go shopping
- Try and figure out if you like to get things done then go to sleep or get some sleep in then do some jobs
- As things can tend to come into your head throughout the day make a list of things that you need to get done at home, and then be strict with yourself and get them done either before or after your sleep depending on when you've decided is best for you to do them.
Seeing friends and family
Not seeing friends and family can be a shame because if you're not seeing them you may not be able to de-stress and have fun and relax. They may also not realise just how much your job impacts on your free time, so make sure you tell them and it might help them to be more proactive in finding out when you're free before organising events, gatherings, etc. rather than organising things and then you feeling down because you cannot make it. At the same time you need to be organised (sorry there's that dreaded word again!) and arrange in advance to see friends and family. You don't necessarily have to have anything planned just get dates in their diary and your diary which may also motivate you to make the most of your days off so you feel more refreshed when you're back at work.
If you're just not set up physically or mentally to do shift work then may be considering a change in job or career may help. This could be difficult with the current economically challenging times and global credit crunch but you could improve your job prospects with training and education. I know the fact your time off is probably pretty important and sacred to you but if you've got free time when college and training courses run then these may be an option to learn a new skill, trade, profession, etc.
Searching for a date
So you may work odd hours, you might have free time when alot of other people are working or asleep, so where can you find potential matches and dates? Well the first obvious place to look is at work. Although there can be lots of issues with dating people from work (see dating at work advice) but as a potential work around maybe somebody in a different department, therefore you get the benefit of them probably working similar hours but you don't see them (at the moment!) on a day-to-day basis. Get involved in different parts of your company to meet people in different departments, for example, volunteer to help or create socials and social events and also this might indirectly help your career!
Going on dates
So if you've found someone you'd like to go on a date with, but you can only meet at odd times due to the hours you both work where can you meet and what can you do together? Here are some suggestions for date ideas:
- early morning walks and watch the sunrise
- go to the shops together when no one else is around and not getting stuck in traffic
- go out for your 'Friday night' on a Tuesday, treat yourself and make use of mid-week offers at restaurants and cinemas
- have a midnight picnic in the park by moonlight on warm summer evenings
For more date ideas suggestion
Balancing work and dating as well as everything else that goes on in your life can be a difficult challenge. Working to master this work life balance can potenttially really help to improve your quality of life and hopefully your dating as well. Good luck!
Let us know how you get on (contact us) and as we get feedback we'll update the dating site to make it as helpful and useful as we can to give some really worthwhile dating tips and advice.