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Online dating sites vs real life dating

How does online dating vs traditional dating compare?

As you'll see for many of the sections in this article there certainly is a lot if pros and cons to internet online dating vs real world dating. Dating is a very personal experience to you and what is an advantage for some people is not good for other people. So read on and see what you think, what your views are and what applies to you and your dating experiences.

Getting to know someone

In dating if this comes easy to you, meeting someone in the flesh, chatting and getting to know them can be a lot easier than trying to do this with online dating. This is because it can be time consuming and tedious to keep thinking of things to write down in messages to one another and to maintain the interest of the other person who you are considering dating. Alternatively if you are quite shy and introvert having the opportunity to think of your answers and write then down using online dating messaging may appeal a lot more rather than the risk of having to think on your feet if you meet up straight away. This is not to say that you should hold off meeting up in real life, but it might just be for some people more easier and less stressful to build a rapport with people online before they meet up in real life such as at a bar or at a restaurant for a meal out which can be quite intense.

Lots of variety to choose from with online dating sites

Online dating can be much simpler and easier to match people who have similar likes and values. Dating members then often after they've decided what they're looking for in a date, search through the online dating database to see which of the dating members appeal and which members fancy. Comparing this to real life dating meeting people whilst out socialising it is not often the case where you are lucky enough to be able to pick from a whole lot of people which people you like, fancy and like to have a date with. Speed dating is one form of real life dating that potentially bucks this trend but the down side is it can take courage to go speed dating and be able to remember which of the people you liked and for what reason.

Additionally with online dating you can start conversations and messaging with multiple people who are looking for a date to try and make your dating as successful as possible.

Dating safety

Is dating safety better with internet dating vs real life dating? It is difficult to have an exact answer for this situation because in the real world it depends on the situation in which you meet the person. In comparison to randomly meeting someone in a bar when perhaps you've had a few to drink, some people may have the opinion that it may be safer to meet people online because before meeting up for the first time you can build a rapport, get to know the other person and perhaps build an initial amount of trust. However alternatively in the real world if your friends have met the person you're going to be dating, have chatted to them as well when you first met them, or perhaps you've been introduced to your date through a friend or work colleague you may be more confident in trusting this person more than if you'd met them randomly through an internet dating site.

However online dating is definitely not without its pitfalls and disadvantages when it comes to dating safety. With online dating you may not be sure that the type of person you are conversing and messaging with is real or made up in a scam.

This will always be an ongoing debate but wherever you meet someone who you start dating think about your safety, if you can trust them and tell you friends and family who you're meeting, where and when you meet, and what time you expect to finish the date. This is very important! Don't forget your dating safety!

Are you flirty or quite shy?

Online dating may allow you to be much more direct than you might normally be when you approach someone you might quite like to date. You might find it really difficult to go up to girls or boys and strike up a conversation.

If you tend to sometimes be shy (see our how to flirt tips article if you're interested) when it comes to meeting people to potentially date, online dating can be a help to allow you to break down any barriers to communication by simply being able to search for those people you fancy, like the look of and enjoy reading their online dating profile and initiate contact at the click of a button. This initial messaging, chatting and online conversation can give you confidence to help you on your first date getting chatting straight away to get to know each other well and you may have a few ice breakers to reduce the likelihood of any uncomfortable silences on the first date.

Alternatively if you're quite flirty and confident this can potentially be quite successful to meet new people in real life without the need to use internet dating sites. Being flirty, having fun and having a bit of a laugh and a joke can help to quickly get to know one another. However being flirty using an online dating platform can potentially be a bit more of a challenge as flirting may be a bit more difficult to put into words in your profile and if you strike up a conversation via the dating website and start chatting. That's not to say you can't flirt using online dating sites, it's just that it may be easier and work more successfully in the real world. Additionally it can be a worry that your flirting using the online dating platform chatting and messaging may not come across as intended, or the message you want to convey may get lost in translation. Saying that though if flirting doesn't come naturally to you, you may find it easier to flirt and have less personal barriers to flirting with people you like using online dating sites chat features and tools.

Quicker to find potential matches

Are you in a rush?

In the real world it can sometimes be difficult to put yourself in a situation where you can meet people who are also looking to date. This is especially difficult if you work irregular hours, varied days, work long hours, or work a shift pattern and when all your friends are out socialising you're at work and vice versa. Online dating can be very useful in this situation especially Dating All Hours which can allow you to find other dating members who work irregular hours. This is because you can quite quickly and easily find other people on the dating site who are looking to date and potentially strike up a relationship. A problem with real life dating is it's difficult to know whether other people you meet in your everyday life, through friends or when you're out socialising are also looking for a date, have not already got a girlfriend or boyfriend or instead they're just being friendly.

Online dating profile

How are your writing skills to sell yourself?

The main problem with online dating is you tend to more successful if you can 'sell yourself' through the online dating profile you create that can help for you to appeal to more of the other dating members when you appear in their dating search results. Writing skills cannot come naturally to you and you could find writing a profile a bit of a challenge. Alternatively online dating profiles do have the advantages that you have time to think about how you want to portray yourself and what are the best bits about you that you want to bring out and highlight.

In the real world you don't have to worry about sitting down and thinking how best to write an online dating profile and what to put in it, you can just chat with people on dates and through socialising and through chatting they get to know you and your likes and dislikes. However on traditional dates if you by mistake say something you don't mean or say something out of turn it can potentially put you in a bad light or create a bad impression of you. Online dating may have the advantage in this situation but at the same time even with online dating you will meet up at some point and potentially have the same problem of giving the wrong impression, although hopefully your date will know you better from chatting online and know what to expect.

Online dating profile photo

Ahhh online dating photos unfortunately can be notoriously difficult to get right for either when you create your online dating profile or viewing other people's dating profile photos. People can sometimes tend to look quite different in real life compared with what the dating member looks like in his or her photo from their dating profile. In real life you can see someone when you're out and there may be that spark, there's that love at first sight which may not happen using online dating websites.

Alternatively the phrase 'don't judge a book by its cover' can quite nicely demonstrate the advantage to online dating in the sense that often in the real world it can be too easy to overlook other people who at first you don't think see the attraction between you, there may not necessarily be that 'love at first site'. But often when you get to know someone suddenly you see things you didn't see before, you see past the superficial and can become more attracted to one each other as a result. In the same way you could meet someone in a bar or out socialising who you are very attracted you and you really fancy and when you start chatting and get to know the other person you realise you really don't match one another and perhaps they really annoy you!

Internet dating and rejection

When you meet someone in real life you can get on really well although there may just not be that chemistry, that spark between you. If only one of you thinks this it can make it difficult to reject and stop the communication between the two of you. With online dating you have more control over who keeps in contact with you, and who you break contact. Also with online dating you can perhaps get to know the person better through messaging.

Money, money, money

Online dating can cost you money if you choose to use paid dating sites vs free dating sites. But then so can real world dating be expensive if you go for dates it can be expensive to travel, pay for drinks and eating out (unless of course you do a dinner date which can be a great idea).


Whatever you chose to do that is most effective and works well for you to meet people whether that be with traditional dating or using online dating sites, we wish you all the best and lots of luck to find that special someone.

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